on misogyny and sexism
2003-11-02

Do I come across as a misogynist?
I guess I�m not as good at articulating my passions as I thought.
I don�t hate women. I don�t �look down� on women.
I don�t hate men either. Well, at least not most of the time. Rather, I look down on the social structures that make women second class citizens.

I am beginning to understand that men aren�t the only culprits in this situation; women sometimes perpetuate the same social structures that keep them down.
In order to make things better for all of us, major social changes have to be made, but not before enlightenment dawns on the individuals of the society.
Oh yeah, I love breasts too. I�d elaborate but then I don�t want to make some readers feel that the purity of their puasa has been tainted.

It�s true that in this society, being a man is more advantageous. I�d be lying if I say I have never wished I were a man.

In the workplace: Men are paid higher than women, a concept once useful (since men were the only breadwinners) but now obsolete (since many single mothers and single women work to support their families).

In the family: The man is accorded more respect due to the reason that he is a MAN. Only until recently, women had to have permissions from husbands to be eligible for credit cards. Don�t believe me? Ask your mom.

In religious structures: Men become Imams, Rabbis and Popes. Women are allowed in, but are forced to stay in the lower ranks e.g. nuns in Catholic churches. Only recently have there been women rabbis. I don't know about women Imams.

Does God prefer men? That�s what men would like us all to think, but I sincerely do not think so.

I think, if I were a man, and I was brought up the way I am, I would be a feminist, just like I am now. At the very least, I would be a gentleman, like my brother is. But I don�t know. I�m pretty much a feminist because I was aware of the disadvantages of being female in a patriarchal society. I don�t know if I�d be as perceptive if I were a boy playing bola while my sisters are cleaning the dishes inside.

This is what I mean by enlightenment. If the boy realizes how unfair it is for him to play while his sisters work, then, slowly, things would change. He would grow up a feminist, and so would his sons and grandsons. By the time I�m dead, women would probably be on equal footing with men.

Oops, am I being too optimistic?

On a side note, many people have come to this site via searches, and I�m pretty sure the people doing the searches are Malay, and most likely, Muslim and male. Some time ago I wrote a review on PMT in Malay. Yeah. Bad move.
The queries are pretty much of the same nature e.g. �luc@h�, �d@ra�, �mal@m p3ngantin�.

And these searches have doubled since Ramadhan started!!
What the hell?
Isn't puasa all about self-control and abstaining from sin??
Apa hal??