and She said, "Let there be Enthusiasm"...
Monday, Jul. 07, 2003

Hello. Welcome to the first installment of The Enthusiast.

Let's get acquainted, shall we?

I used to be a complete tomboy during my high school years. I had very short hair, cut this close to the scalp. I suspect being in a girls' school, a boarding school at that, contributed a LOT to my decision to be as unfeminine as possible during my teenage years.

I used to live for attention. I needed to be in the spotlight as much as possible.
I figured out early on that I had to be different in order to be noticed, ergo the "pseudo-male" personality. In a sea of soft, pretty, practically faceless girls, tomboys stand out like palm trees in Iceland.

It helped that I was thin, athletic and flat-chested; it's so much easier pretending to be a boy when you don't have perky breasts announcing themselves to the world. *grin*

And no, I did not engage in homoerotic activities [ed: wish I did though! >;P]
Oh, but I did have my share of admirers - young girls looking for figures they can look up to and emulate, like the enigmatic *Kak Idah.

Ha!

I can see my fellow batchmates coughing up hairballs, doubled-up and retching after reading that sentence.

Anyhoo.
During those years, I did everything in my power to be noticed by all and sundry.
Good deeds. Bad choices.
But I got the much craved attention.

The reason I am reminiscing about those awkward times is because I realize now, I was most enthusiastic, most passionate about the things I was involved with at that age than at any other period in my life. Granted, my motivation was somewhat unhealthy, but the enthusiasm that helped me get through that phase is still commendable.

Nowadays, the little bit of enthusiasm I have is used up for getting new clothes/gadgets/shoes. How utterly...worldly.

I started The Enthusiast to once again possess and be possessed by that kind of spirit. This is my attempt to recapture the Passion that has dripped out of the soul, bit by bit, unnoticed, as I leave my stormy adolescence behind.


I am the Enthusiast.
Here me squeak with glee.